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let's chat ...

So, this one isn't just for us active ones, but for the lurkers out there. I know you're there. I know you read and watch and log on late at night to see what people are up to.

So here's my question - well, my questions -

What keeps you posting? OR, if you're a lurker, what keeps you FROM posting? Life, liberty, the pursuit of writing ... it's all for us to chat about here. What is hardest for you? If you're a regular writer, are there things you avoid? If you're a lurker, what keeps you hiding out?

Let's chat.

May. 1st, 2016

I'm the only one of my parents' children who still lives with them while going to college.

Anneke went to school in the city, yeah, but she lived in an apartment near campus with two friends. My brother completely left the state, so no problem there.

It isn't like I'm staying here to save money. Sure, it helps, but we all know it isn't necessary.

Nope, I'm here because living on my own, even with a roommate, is just not possible. It isn't like I haven't tried. My parents were thrilled when I decided to go to a school upstate. But I only lasted a year and wanted to change majors and go to a school in Connecticut.

So I did that.

I actually made it two years before I flunked out because I stopped going to class. I'd miss a couple of classes and then because I felt like I had gotten way behind, I couldn't face the professor so I'd continue to miss class.

It's still not good, but it's better. I have been on every mood stabilizer and anti-depressant and anti-psychotic under the sun and finally, we seem to have one that is working for me. I put my parents through hell when I was 13-14. Mom turned down offers and opportunities in Europe because they were afraid I'd set the apartment on fire.

This is not something I talk about much and when I do, I tend to minimize it. I'm proud of Mom and how vocal she is and all the work she does with various foundations and charities, but that's not for me. I don't feel like what goes on in my head is anybody's business but mine and my parents'.

I guess the only reason I'm telling anybody this is because I realized I've had one of the songs from Gravitational Collapse on repeat all day. The chorus...it's... it's simple: I will overcome.

he thinks he's cool ...

What with the sunglasses and leather jacket and that goatee. But really, he's a dufus of a daddy who wants his baby boy to feel like he can do anything he wants in the world. And it's one of the many reasons I wish that LA and Pendelton were closer together. Because honestly, there are ... he's a fantastic father and a wonderful man. We don't want to end it, but if it does ... we're ending it on a good note, damnit. But for now, we're just enjoying each other and Lucas.

Apr. 30th, 2016

I spent hours today, listening to the elders tells stories about the Englishmen who came through here 168 years ago. The stories have been passed down through generations and I wonder how much of the truth is still there. They talk about these men, men wearing heavy blue wool coats and not a scrap of fur or skin. They talk about how these men pulled boats on runners filled with silly things like books and hairbrushes and silverware. They bartered for food but didn't think to learn how to catch an animal themselves. And they died in their tracks alongside these boat-sleds.

Mum duties

Mary's been sick all day, all night. Running a fever and hurling all her stomach contents well beyond what a little girl should be. She's so miserable. Dave's kept Josh occupied all day and they're having a boy's "camping out" boys weekend, which is really just them getting all kinds of junk food, pulling out sleeping bags, and watching movies in Josh's room while Mary's curled up in bed with me feeling pitiful. She's been asleep for a while and I hope it's going to stay that way. I read to her for an hour or so while she wasn't vomiting. It was a pleasant distraction from the world of this week. I know it sounds bizarre to say that being up with my sick child is pleasant. But when she's snuggled next to me, wanting to listen to me read, it's not so bad. Her fever isn't enough to be worried and it's been a few hours since she last got sick. The crackers have stayed down and the ginger ale has seemed to settle for her. So I get to just be Mum for a while with my little girl. Before too long she'll be too old to want to do this. As it is, she's 8 with a fiercely independent streak in her. I love it, I love watching my kids grow into their little personalities, getting glimpses of what they're going to be like as adults.

I think at the next school holiday I want to take them to visit Mikey and let them explore Gran's old neighborhood, the coast, the church... We've been up to visit Mikey before, in Blackpool, but I've never taken them back to Little Bispham. It was as much my home as anywhere else, but more magical.

Yes, I think I've been reading stories too long tonight.

Last night of the comment fic ...

Some of us are total losers on a Saturday night and will be home, writing ... Join me! :P

The Comment Fic Party Ends Tonight!

And remember, if you're in the middle of round robins or anything like that, the post will not be locked. I just won't be posting reminders anymore. And for those of you who still have stuff lingering - POST! :D

It's always so much fun to do these.

And, if you are around and want to chat about life and writing, I'll be here and ready to talk in the comments.

Happy Birthday, Ellie!!!!!!!

Just for you. :P

Love you, sis. So fucking glad you're still with us. On stage and in our lives.

and with that ...

Our last day in Paradise comes to an end.

We're going to stop by and see Abuela before we head back to the States.

But ... we're about to enter real life again.

I'm really not sure I'm ready for this.

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