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I hate my English teacher. Loathe, detest, despise, execrate him...

My paper is trite, he said. Boring, bland, and flat. Reads like sparknotes. Says it's an ongoing problem with me. That he doesn't care if I was raised by an entire professoriate of English teachers, that the interpretation I've given is so dull he couldn't be bothered to come up with a reasonable simile for a punchline.

He told me to redo it and to use my imagination this time.

This is ridiculous.

Sep. 23rd, 2016

I made the mistake of venting to Alana. I knew better, but sometimes, Paz can be...too much in Lang's corner. Alana has no brain to mouth filter, though. So she said "who knows, maybe she killed Darryl."

i think ...

It might be time to give LA another try.

For a lot of reasons.




[A/N: Yup. This is what happens with multiple timelines at once. Sorry! #notsorry]
I can't sleep. I had very nearly forgotten about this man and then the Universe decided I needed a reminder. As if I could ever truly forget. I'm in such trouble.

We're on our way to the UK. If you don't hear from us for a while it's because we've either murdered Matt because he's being intolerable or he's murdered us because he's lost his damn mind.

Thanks, BBC, for making an awkward situation even worse.

just a friendly reminder ...

Prompts are open until Sunday!!!

The stuff posted already is awesome! Go take a read.
It's almost funny ... Papi and I are the ones in shock. Mami wants to keep working.

Yes ... if you haven't heard ... if you don't know the headline that won't leave me the fuck alone ...

Legendary Actress Gina Case diagnosed with terminal kidney cancer, publicist confirms.

So ... fucking brutal.

She isn't surviving this one. It's terminal. It's in her system. It's a matter of fucking weeks and she's talking about working! She can't stand up and the doctors want her on some kind of chemo treatment and she's talking about fucking working.

And here she is ... laughing and I just want to hold time in place.

Because there can't be a world without my mommy. There can't.

So I'm so sorry to the fans who are getting refunds on the tour. And the people we are disappointing. I'm so sorry.

But I only have a few weeks left to hear this laugh.

I can't miss a single second.
Toddlers have such a great grasp on the word "no". I think I unlearned it around the time when I realized saying "yes" to everything and everyone was the best way to keep myself safe.

You all know this little guy, I assume:
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That was me last year.

I left Europe feeling great.  I'd promised myself I'd say "no" to more things.  I was going to thin out my schedule.

I had said I only wanted to do one or two songs before I gave myself completely to the orchestra. But because I was feeling good, I allowed myself to get talked into doing more.



Sure, I can schlep across the entire state of New Jersey several times a week and pack up my house and take my kids to daycare/dance class/whatever and grow a new human and somehow eat on schedule and...

This is fine.



Then it hit me like a bolt of lightning this morning.

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Maybe not quite as much panic, but I definitely said all of those things.

I don't want to live like this.  I really do not.  For as much as I'm trying to have a sense of humor about this, I am determined to not end up where I was.  Why am I doing this to myself and how do I...not?

I have commitments to people and I'm not going to back out of them, so I'll have to...I don't know, figure something out.
There are days when I want to shut the world out. So instead of thinking of all the horrid I'm focusing on Mary's sudden desire to get a dog. Dave doesn't think it would be a good idea and I really want to disagree with him, but I can't. I'd love to have a little fluffy animal to dote on. So we're trying to convince her to go for a cat. She's got no desire for one, though. They're totally different animals to care for and she hates the notion of a litter box.

We're going to see if she'd be willing to go volunteer, and perhaps that would get her urges out of the way, because she is a persistent child. Gets that from her dad, that's for sure. She's been pulling up pictures of sad little puppies at local rescues, telling stories about them that we're pretty sure are entirely fabricated. But she's always been an incredibly creative little girl. Not sure where she gets that from, but it's enough to distract my overworked mind.

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